Are you fighting being closed off? Relax into it. Accept it as it is. Fighting a feeling keeps you stuck in it.
For example, when you try to suppress a laugh, you laugh even more. Relaxing into the laughter allows you to let it go. Acceptance of the way things are is the first step towards change.
What are you protecting yourself from? What would happen if you opened your heart again? Is protecting your heart worth the pain of it being closed?
As you imagine yourself opening up, what is the best possible outcome? What is the worst possible outcome? What is the most likely outcome?
Are any of those scenarios worth closing your heart for? Is there another way to protect yourself so you can live with an open heart?
It takes courage to face your fears with an open heart. You still have choice. You can chose not to put yourself in a situation where you may be hurt.
Having an open heart is different than being a victim. The most open hearted people I know are some of the strongest and bravest people I know.
What happens that causes you to close your heart? Are they situations or people you can avoid? Don’t let people make you feel that you must shut your heart down.
- Confront them,
- learn to accept them as they are or
- avoid them.
Keeping your heart open is more important than a dysfunctional relationship.
If it is a family member, it can be more difficult. What is the price of confronting your family member? Can you allow them to be their obnoxious self and not take it personally? What is the price of avoiding them for a while?
Facing your fear with an open heart is not easy. There are better ways of dealing with the fear than shutting down your heart.
- You can confront the situation head on,
- You can chose to accept it and live with it as it is or
- You can chose to cut the person or situation out of your life.
The choice is yours. Keep your heart open and protect its openness by using one of the options listed above or your own strategy.
©2016 Stephen L. Martin
Painting: Vassily Kandinsky-Composition 10